You’re Not Lazy! You’re Out of Rhythm With Your Energy.

Why timing matters more than effort for women’s nervous systems and hormones

Most women don’t burn out because they’re doing too much, they burn out because they’re doing the right things at the wrong time in the wrong energy.

In a recent conversation with my function medicine gut-health-specialist friend Leisa, we unpacked something that feels deceptively simple but is profoundly regulating for a woman’s nervous system, hormones, digestion, creativity, and relationships.

Structuring your day to honour both your feminine and masculine energy, instead of living in one all day long.

For many women, the moment we wake up, we’re naturally in our feminine state. Before emails, to-do lists and before the mental load switches on. This is the receptive, intuitive, creative state,  where insight, vision, and feeling live. It’s why mornings often feel softer, slower, and more spacious until we start thinking about work.

The moment you start planning, organising, structuring, or problem-solving, you’re activating masculine energy. That’s not wrong, it’s essential, but it’s not where most women thrive first thing in the morning. This is why being jolted awake by the news, notifications, or someone else’s urgency or schedule can feel deeply unsettling. Your nervous system hasn’t had time to orient. You’re still in your feminine open, intuitive, and inward state.

The early part of the day is a powerful time to capitalise on feminine energy, rather than override it.

It might look like gentle yoga or stretching, meditation or breath-work, dream journaling or intuitive journaling or sitting quietly with tea or coffee.  Leisa when she is in Australia loves having a walk on the beach in the morning. When I was visiting my friend’s house who lived in the woods, I took my coffee out with me to commune with the trees.

This is the space where creativity lives so it’s a good time to visualise what you want to create and how you want to feel.  The process of “morning pages” can be a wonderfully reflective of what came up during dreamtime. Or if you’re working on something artistic, visionary, or intuitive like writing, designing, or brainstorming ideas, staying in this energy a little longer can be incredibly productive without force.

There is a time to shift into the masculine and it matters because masculine energy is brilliant at planning and organising, goal-setting, structuring timelines, using focus and drive, executing tasks and “marching through” a to-do list!

After you’ve nourished the feminine, the transition into masculine becomes clean and contained, rather than frantic. This might look like, getting dressed and entering your workspace, opening your calendar, working with spreadsheets, schedules, or long-term planning,  and tackling admin, emails, logistics, and deadlines.

The key is to not stay there all day without interruption because too much unbuffered masculine energy can push a woman into stress and agitation, impatience and irritability, nervous system overload, hormonal disruption, even digestive issues and fatigue. We’re not designed to live in constant output.  I can really see the results of 7 years of almost constant “hustle” in my vertical learning curve of taking my business on line and focussing on marketing and all things business and I ended up losing touch with myself, and facing complete and utter burn-out.

I can’t stress enough that even during focused work, weaving in brief returns to the feminine keeps the system regulated. You could do that by stepping onto your yoga mat for a few breaths, stretching between tasks, pausing to feel your body or softening your breath before continuing. Five minutes of meditation can change everything. Or play with the cat and feel the purr reverberating through you, or your dogs happy tail swishing for the joy of your attention.  Its a real grounder.

These small interruptions prevent the “gung-ho masculine” state that eventually spills into stress, worry, and illness. Once the “have-to-do’s” are complete, the day needs a deliberate downshift. This transition matters, especially for women in relationships. When a woman remains in masculine mode into the evening, connection suffers. There’s no space to receive, soften, or relate.

A regulated feminine nervous system is foundational for intimacy. If you’ve spent the entire day organising, managing, caring for others, making decisions, holding responsibility, your body needs time to unwind.

Many women need up to two hours to fully transition out of task-mode and into receptivity. Without this, intimacy can feel intrusive rather than connecting. This is why slow evening rituals, baths, massage, presence, are not luxuries. They’re prerequisites for genuine desire and safety in the body.

Evening feminine practices might include changing into softer or more sensual clothing, walking slowly in nature, preparing nourishing food without rush, epsom salt baths with essential oils (rose, geranium, heart-opening scents), self-massage with oils, candles, low lighting, gentle music…

This isn’t indulgence — it’s regulation. A masculine approach says “go hard every day.” A feminine approach says “flow with what’s actually here.” When women ignore this rhythm, fatigue, illness, and hormonal imbalance often follow.

When you honour feminine energy your creativity flows, hormones stabilise, digestion improves, relationships soften and the nervous system feels safe. And when masculine energy is used consciously, not compulsively, it becomes a powerful ally rather than a source of depletion.

By the way I’ve renamed my Mind-Shift Compass Call to a Truth Map Call.  I’ve been sitting with my feminine creativity and feeling into my business and brand and the energy I want to give out, and that’s what surfaced!  So why not book a free 30 minutes to speak what’s real and come home to yourself? Click here: https://bit.ly/TruthMapCall