Many people have experienced what is known in my area of work as Dark Night of the Soul. This is technically when your guardian angels take a hike to create space for new guides to come forward.
Dark Night of the Soul is not fun.
I first experienced this when I was 37 and felt like I had nothing to show for my life despite the fact that at the time I had a loving husband, 2 beautiful children, a great house, fab friends, excellent health and a super fit body.
Being a fundamentally happy, glass half full kind of person, it felt like I had lost all of my joy. There was no light at the end of a very long dark tunnel, and I certainly had no hope or way of seeing my situation change.
Granted, this was before I had started my spiritual path so I hadn’t done much, if any, deep healing work and I still generally felt empty, trapped, angry all that stuff that sends us to therapy in the first place.
I laid on the floor in a heap crying everyday with no answers to anything and also felt scared and confused because I didn’t have any understanding of what was happening to me.
Many people commit suicide during Dark Night of the Soul because those etherial energetic angel wings are not there quietly holding you when you feel so alone. Your guide is absent which is why it all feels so dramatically depressing and hopeless.
This is the time when we are un-manifesting all of our old structures to clear the decks to make room for a new map of how we’re going to move forward.
Often great changes happen as a result of coming through the Dark Night of the Soul. It is the Universe’s invitation to go within, deeply, to unplug from your “reality” and face your deepest shadows lurking within.
I went to visit a therapist friend on the Isle of Man and she turned me on to Transactional Analysis. The rest is history. Ultimately, that experience led me to finding my shamanic path and creating the life I have today.
A spiritual awakening can feel very much the same, like all hell is breaking loose in your mind, heart, organs, veins as though you’re being turned inside out. You kind of are….so the first thing we naturally do is RESIST.
And we all know resistance causes physical and energetic contraction which doesn’t help the expansion that is insisting on taking place within us.
So we feel worse.
Then we may try to escape or numb out or simply be in denial or going through the motions of life, not really engaging, caring or feeling anything, except perhaps depression.
The worst part, especially if you don’t know what you’re going through is feeling and thinking that it will never end! That you will never have answers! That the light in any form will never return.
It’s heavy.
I think the whole world is in a kind of collective Dark Night of the Soul at the moment. We have all had a lot of huge crisis’ to contend with, without answers or knowing when or if the world horrors would shift and will it get better or worse?
But what I do know from life experience and the various levels of spiritual awakening, kundalini awakenings and of course coming through the Dark Night of the Soul, is that things DO change.
And often for the better.
So if you’re experiencing some level of this right now, keep the faith (that you trust you have even if you can’t tune into it at the moment) that things will shift.
You have a choice here.
You can keep running, screaming, escaping, denying, or you can do your very best to accept that you’re in a process, honour the extreme discomfort, unplug from everything and everyone if at all possible, sleep a lot, cry if you can, drink lots of water and go within to face all the deepest fears you have.
It’s really the perfect time.
People avoid doing healing work because they’re afraid of what it may stir up. Well, you’re already stirred up, so you have nothing to lose! You can’t feel any worse, so go for it!
Then one day, in one small way, you’ll notice that you’re smiling at something, or laughing, or engaging, or feel a spark of energy.
You’ll cling on to that moment of light and inspiration as though it was your last breath and it will generate another breath, and another until eventually you will be blowing bubbles with joy again.
And soon you’ll come out the other side with a new guardian angel, guide, perspective, and your appreciation and gratitude for having survived all that internal insanity will be off the roof.
You may find yourself in a whole new phase of life!
I encourage you to look at it as a catalyst for immense personal growth and change, a kind of rebirth, and allow yourself to be in your process, free from judgement.
Need some guidance during this process? Book a call. I’ll slip my angel wings on.