Confidence is the memory of action. When we’re not feeling confident about something we’re doubting what we fundamentally know within us.
We’re thinking, “Oh, I can’t do this or I don’t know what’s going to happen!” We’re projecting fear about the unknown.
But when we think about all of the life experiences that we’ve had, there’s some aspect of almost every new thing that we’re going to do that we’ve done before.
So if it’s travelling, for example, you’re nervous because you’ve never gone to this new place and you don’t know what’s going to happen. Tap into the part of travelling that you do know. All of the amazing adventures. Confident because you know that you can talk to local people and find your way around a new city with a map.
Maybe you haven’t stood up in front of a bunch of people to speak before. That’s a number one stressor in the world. But think about the times that you have actually held court with your friends, or had to stand up in class even when you were a kid to read a report that you wrote, or maybe you were in the school play or on the debate team! Whatever it was, there’s some aspect of what you’re trying to do, that you’ve done before.
Just this past week, I signed up for a major course. A big chunk of money. And I knew that it was the right thing for me and on the one to one call I said, “Okay, that’s great. Tell me what your rates are.” And she told me her rates. I said, “Great, what’s your payment plan?” And she told me her payment plan. I said, “Okay, I have to check my finances.” And she just kind of tilted her head. And I said, “Okay, I know you need a deposit.” She confirmed that. So I said, “Hold on one minute,” and I got my phone and checked my finances right then while she was getting her Stripe account up so she could take the payment. I took about ten minutes and went through everything while she waited. I didn’t go away to think about it and allow my ego mind to doubt and talk myself out of it. While I was in the energy of following my inner guidance and intuition, I made the commitment.
And then it was done. And I said, “Don’t you wish all of your clients were like that?” And she said, “You know, if you want your clients to be like that, you have to be like that.”
And I thought, yes, that’s exactly true. You’ve got to be decisive and you’ve got to trust that your intuition is talking to you and inspiring you at the right moment.
When I got off the call, I was so excited because I’d signed up for the course about how to get on the TEDx stages. That’s my goal for this year! Watch this space.
And I thought back to almost five years ago, when I signed up to learn how to take my business online. That was a big chunk of money too, and I was absolutely terrified. I was scared and I wanted to take time, but I knew I wanted to do it. I absolutely knew it was the right thing to do, yet I still wasn’t in that place of totally trusting.
You need to invest in yourself if you’re going to expand. I thought what a difference from then to now like, yep, this is what I want to do! Yes, I know it’s going to cost money. Let’s see what I can do right now. With zero doubt, because I know that when I’m following my truth and trusting my path, everything is going to work out for me.
That’s a confidence that I have, because I’ve done it before. Now, the confidence that you’re tapping into from your life experience might not have all been easy sailing. But the point is, that you’ve gotten through it. You’re right here, right now, a wiser, better version of yourself because of your life experience.
All of the contrasting events that we’ve had in life have led us to this perfect place now because the contrast lets us know where we are feeling wobbly and need to do the work; where we need to dive in and really look inside ourselves to pull out that level of confidence.
Besides the TEDx Talk course, I also signed up for a stand-up comedy course. I don’t want to be a stand-up comedian, but I thought it would be a really good confidence booster because if I have to stand there and make people laugh, then certainly I can stand on a stage and talk about my passion and educate people without the pressure of needing to be funny while I’m doing it.
I was a little bit nervous because that’s pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. New people, I don’t know what to expect. But I went to the class and it was absolutely brilliant. I’m standing up there and I thought, yeah, well, I’ve been on stage before, I’m not afraid of eye contact! I’m used to speaking in public via my laptop, maybe not with a whole audience in front of me, but there’s some element of that, that I can feel confident about.
So when I was there, I thought actually, this isn’t too scary. We have the graduation show in six weeks. I’ll probably be quite nervous, but that can be nervous excitement. There’s a first time for everything we do. Practice makes perfect, so I’ll rely on the next six weeks of learning and practicing to build my confidence for when it’s time for me to get up there and do it!
So remember all of your life experience and stop doubting yourself. If the universe is tapping your brain with an inspired moment of “this is what I’ve got to do now. This is going to be good for me. This is going to be scary,” then that’s the time to take action.
I was really proud of my son because he was offered two jobs; one job that he knew really well and had been at before, and another job that’s new. I said, “you got your other job back! That’s fantastic. Would you go back to that one?” And he said, “No, actually, I’d take the new one!” I asked him why because I thought the other one was a pretty cushy job. He said, “Well, yeah, but it was in my comfort zone and I want to expand and grow.” And I thought, right on!
That is the way to go in life if you want to keep evolving. You need to take a step outside of your comfort zone. You need to look in the areas that you’re not currently looking and that is how you build confidence. Your comfort zone is basically your uncomfortable comfort zone, because it’s keeping you small. It’s keeping you in your safe zone. So you want to build your confidence?
Remember, some kind of action that you took before that was similar. Remember the last time you stepped out of your comfort zone and all of the things that you learned as a result. It’s not easy stepping out of your comfort zone. Sometimes you feel like, “oh my god, what am I doing?” But that’s okay because you come out stronger, wiser and hopefully with a better sense of humour about yourself. That usually happens to me.
So where am I going with this? Well, the webinar for the next run up of From Fear Into Love is February 11th which is a Saturday at 2pm. I’m going to talk all about From Fear Into Love because it is the best self development course out there at the moment.
If you really want to expand your conscious awareness and either reach self-actualization if you’re not there already, or take yourself from the point of self-actualization, like if you’re a coach or an amazing healer or firmly on your spiritual path and you’re already helping people, but you want to go beyond, then this is the course for you.
This course will hold you accountable and help you really understand more than ever your level of self awareness and your clients, friends and family’s levels and also it will help you understand your level of self-management, how you manage yourself in every situation when you’re out of your comfort zone; when you’re in it, at work, with your family, and when you’re having conflict.
You will understand and heighten your social management as well. How you engage with the rest of the world. And what’s going on in your head anyway! It will help you have more empathy for everyone, most importantly yourself.
So if you want to really get to a point of personal sovereignty, understanding the depths of who you are and how you experience the world like never before, this is the course for you and I really would love to see you on the webinar. If you come on the webinar and stay till the end I’m giving everybody a huge discount when you sign up and pay in full. It can radically change this year for you; not just this year, but the rest of your life.
The first class of From Fear Into Love starts March 14th, which is a Tuesday. The calls are mandatory. They’re at 7pm UK time.
I look forward to seeing you and I would love to work with you this year. If you have any questions whatsoever, why don’t you book a mind shift call with me? A complimentary 20 minutes – let’s have a chat. Often people on these calls have a big ‘aha’ moment right in that time.
My deepest satisfaction in the world is to help people shift. That’s what motivates me every single day of my life. I want to live my best life in joy every day and I want to see everyone in the world around me doing the same.
So first of all, remember how confident you are and trust your intuition and listen to those highly inspiring moments from the universe. I love you all so much. I look forward to hearing from you.