Rewrite Your Childhood Paradigm 

What was your early childhood paradigm from when you were 3, 4, or 5 years old?

Go back in your minds eye and see an image of yourself from that time. The first thing that comes to mind.

I can see myself looking pretty cute with 2 high ponytails. I’m standing in front of my childhood house, on the porch where we always used to take first day of school pictures. It’s summertime. I’m wearing a bright yellow shirt and I have a little pinafore dress on. Obviously in my memory, my parents are on the walkway below taking pictures.

But how I feel inside myself is not pretty cute. I must have been five or six. I’m feeling a little bit self conscious. I’m feeling a little bit insecure, because all I wanted to do was to make my parents happy. 

I wanted to please them. And I was never quite sure of what response was I going to be met with because there were so many mixed messages from them on a consistent basis.

My parents, from my adult healed perspective are absolutely wonderful. They’re both exceptional people. 

But that’s not all that forms and shapes us. 

When we’re children, we make a decision based on the information that we’re picking up from our parents.  I never felt truly seen or heard because I felt that my parents were too self involved and too impatient to receive my child like fantasy mind and all of my visions.

I thought I was all knowing because I wasn’t closed down yet. But when they couldn’t deal with my fantastical child’s mind, they would get impatient with me and send me off to my room so that I could process by myself. 

I was put in isolation and then I would have massive temper tantrums, jumping on my bed, screaming and upset with all of this rage because I felt suppressed like they weren’t asking me the right questions. 

They weren’t asking me, “Okay, mind bending child, what is it that’s really going on for you?”

I was discussing this with some of my students. For some people, they might not have felt safe as children. Some may not have felt held, while others might not have felt received. 

It can generate self fulfilling prophecies for you your entire life because you’ll get caught in a certain pattern of a behaviour dynamic. 

It’s extremely helpful to go back to that little child self and rewrite your child paradigm. 

Play out the scene again only this time, how would it be if your parents responded to you the way that you needed them to when you were that child so that you can play that scenario out in your mind’s eye?

My parents would have asked me more intuitive questions, shared more feelings with me, more authentic thoughts instead of just being on the surface of things. 

I wanted more true feeling. I wanted to get into how people were feeling. I didn’t want things to be on the surface. I wanted to be able to express frustration. I wanted to be able to express my feelings of not feeling seen or heard. 

Not that I would have had the words for it at five or six. But I remember feeling frustrated. I wanted my parents to ask better questions, but I didn’t have the verbiage at six to be able to guide them to do that. 

So there was a communication break somewhere. One of my students asked what if one of the things you need is to be received. Because of all the healing and self development work you’ve done, now you know what it’s like to be received, except that from that early child space, because you already made the choice of not knowing what it feels like to be received, until you switch that paradigm energetically for yourself and change it from the past, from the root of when it actually sunk in in the first place, at some level you’re still going to be putting out that energy of “can’t be received” even though that’s what you want the most. 

You may need to re-read that paragraph to let it sink in.  A paradigm is different than a limiting belief. 

There’s a big reframe that needs to happen and you need to clear that energetically. 

You can do that with a whole host of different healing tools available. In my classes, we deal with belief systems, we work with neural pathways in the brain so that you can reprogram them and create a new pathway forward for yourself. 

Healing needs to start at the root of all of the wounding which for most of us started in our formative years. So there’s some good insight for you now, just to go back to that early childhood space.

When you still understood ‘it’s all about love, folks. Its happiness. Its joy.’ “Hey, parents, relax. Stop getting so sad about everything! Why don’t you look at me the child and dive into my fantasy world or ask me about my invisible friend?”

Whatever it is that you felt that you needed from your parents, whether it was more holding, love, acceptance, more freedom, rewrite your childlike paradigm and then apply it to every slice of your life’s pie. 

If you’d like some help with this, and you want to start to do some profound deep self healing work that will serve you for the rest of your life, then the next run of From Fear Into Love is coming up and it starts April 9th. 

I’d love to have you on board. Please book a free mind shift call with me. 20 minutes and you might have a wonderful AHA reframe moment.